Fear (False Evidence Appearing Real)

Hello everyone and welcome back for another reading from the Coach’s Corner. Please take a seat because today I’m going to talk about the dirtiest four letter word in the English dictionary that starts with the word “F.” So keep your mind focused on this immobilizing word that holds all of us back from enjoying the best in life…FEAR.

When you examine the word FEAR closely, you’ll realize that other words will hitch on for a ride like velcro including “afraid”, “anxiety” and “phobia”. There are two types of fears…Normal and Abnormal. Normal fears are good. You see something heavy falling from the sky towards you and you step aside to survive. The sudden fear of being hit by this object is overcome by your action. However, all other fears are abnormal. They were caused by particular experiences or were passed along to you by parents, relatives, siblings, loved ones, teachers and others who influenced your early years. Abnormal fear takes place when people allow false evidences to appear real.

When you think of the word FEAR, what does it represent to you? You can experience all types of fears in a lifetime. There’s really nothing that you can’t develop fears, anxieties or phobias of, including insects to snakes, cats to dogs, from flying in an airplane to driving in a car, heights to claustrophobia, doctors to dentists, needles to pills, water to darkness, success to failure, accommodation to confrontation, rejection to abandonment, from living to dying, and on it goes. But are we really fearful or are we just lacking in the education and hands on knowledge of the circumstances?

Let’s pick spiders for a second. Are some of us fearful of them because they have eight legs, look scary and invade our privacy? Maybe some of us are for one reason or another, but have you actually touched one and felt it crawl on your hand on purpose? Of course you haven’t because just the thought of touching it would make you scream and run in the other direction. However, if you never knew what a spider was, never saw what one looked like or new about their positive attributes to the world, would the fear be different? Would we be able to overcome our anxiety if we had a more clear perception to what spiders were all about and why the existed?

I can tell you without a doubt that sometimes the hardest thing in life is to conquer one’s fears. When we aren’t ready, willing or able (RWA copyrighted by Jeff Saret) to overcome them, we go into a panic mode that can cause some of us to give up on our true happiness, become sick and even possibly die. Some people live their entire lives in fear and never get any help to move forward in living a happy life. The act of being vulnerable and opening themselves up is too great for them to bare. Those who have had a horrible childhood make the decision early in their lives to not have kids when they get older. Those who have gotten their hearts crushed in a relationship decide to live alone without companionship and love because the pain they went through was too great to bare again. As you can see, fear has made the decision for us.

So, what do you do now? Ralph Waldo Emerson, the great nineteenth-century philosopher and poet, once said, “Do the thing you are afraid to do, and the death of fear is certain. Keeping this in mind, just ask yourself these important questions:

  • Who holds me back from having what I truly want in life?
  • What am I truly afraid of?
  • Where am I today and where will I be tomorrow?
  • Why am I afraid to move forward?
  • When will I let go of these fears, anxieties and phobias?
  • How can I conquer these fears so I can start living the life I need to live?

Now that you’ve done your homework, please realize that you’ve just taken the first few steps in conquering your fears. As your inspirational and motivational Life Coach, working together one step at a time and at your own pace, we can help in eliminating and conquering your fears and start living the happy life that you were meant to live in the first place.